And I'm back to writing.
Something happened last night which made me inspired to go back to writing again. Another fiction story perhaps.
I was playing Pokemon Fire Red Version, like I always do for the past week. I don't have much to do, I don't go to school anymore so I don't have ANYTHING else important to do. I have two laptops on, one for playing and the other to browse the walkthrough of the game, I somehow forgot some things regarding the gameplay. I was also on Facebook that time.
*BUZZ*
The buzzing sound of receiving a message on Facebook startled me, I was in the middle of catching a legendary Pokemon, Zapdos. Who can this be? This better be important.
It was one of my ex-girlfriends.
"tol"
"oi tol, musta? nu meron?", I replied.
The next message I received was a link; I opened it right away.
It lead me to a blog she had written on Tumblr. It was relatively new.
"Secret blog ko tol."
I was like "Oh God Why?" Why would she give me access to her secret blog site? I was hesistant, but she told me to read it so I did just that.
"para naman may alam ka tungkol sakin"
We haven't seen each other in a while. The only communication we had was Facebook. But if there's something big I knew about her, it's something that we had in common last year.
We were both left out by our "special someone" at the same time frame last year. We both took it hard deep inside, but knowing her, she didn't let any sign of these hurts show in any way, much like I did.
I was reading her blog, it had a nice layout with music on background. It only had 3 songs, all of which are Utada Hikaru's First Love, only with different versions (1 original, 1 english version, 1 instrumental).
As I was reading I eventually got the sense of why she let me read this and why the background music was almost the same.
Biglaang Kalungkutan was the blog title. And First Love was their theme song, her boyfriend and her.
To make her story short, her boyfriend left her after being together for 3 years. 3 YEARS! I mean the longest serious relationship I had with a girlfriend was 8 months! 3 YEARS! Is this a trend nowadays? I know another couple who'd been in love with each other for the longest time and now they're also apart. What is the world coming into?!
As for every story, there's a good thing and a bad thing it brings about to the reader.
For me, the good thing was the reason I can write this blog post right now. The story was so touching. Until now she still holds on to her feeling s for that guy despite him doing the best he can to throw my Utol under the rug. She fights hard everyday, seeing him with another girl, seeing her own friends ignore her hurts. I admire her toughness, though I have known this trait of hers a long time now. I never knew that someone as tough as my Utol can be this devoted and loving, to the extent of being hurt so badly.
Reading her story inspired me to write a story of my own, based on hers. I would love to turn something this inspiring to me into something that hopefully may be able to touch others as well. Yes, it will be a love story but it will be one with real heart poured into it, mine and that of my Utol's.
Now the bad part.
I may be encouraged regarding the writing aspect, which is good by the way, but I am very much discouraged on the loving aspect :(
I still can't get over the fact that even long term relationships can still end in a snap. I just had my heart broken last year, a full year of offering my heart to that person. I made it through, I have moved on. But 3 years is still too GRAND for me. I know that if I can get the chance to be with someone for three years, I would really give all that I've got for it to never end. But it seems that all that my Utol got was not enough.
What if what I've got will not be enough as well? I have a special girl right now, of course she doesn't know I like her. Some of my friends are telling me it's about time to take another shot at love and take a chance with her. But right now, after last night's alone time with my two laptops, nearly shedding a few tears, I don't know whether to listen to them or listen to my discouraged heart.
It may save me from hurts if I hold back my heart for my own, that will be a win for me. But I may never have that experience only people who have given their love wholeheartedly to someone special may be able to know. And that will be a BIG loss for me.
Writing: WIN
Love: I am not so sure. And I may never be able to be sure at all, if worse come to worse :(
Sabado, Pebrero 25, 2012
Biyernes, Disyembre 16, 2011
This Christmas: Final Part
So, it's official..I am going to quit school for an indefinite span of time. I realized that one thing I need right now is passion and commitment to something, and I honestly don't see it in the academic realm.
And so this Christmas, I would like to start something which I can call a journey, to where I know not of, but I believe of it as quite a worthwhile experience for me. And I call it Mission: Re-ignition
So how do I do this mission? I really have no idea at all. I haven't planned it all out just yet, but there are some things that I will be sure to do as this plan goes along.
1) I shall look for things that makes my heart and brain work together. In short, something worthwhile that I would LOVE to do. ( like blogging :] )
2) I shall keep track of any progress whatsoever. Now this one is somewhat tricky, due to the fact that the first part of this mission takes place in the beautiful province of Oriental Mindoro. Unfortunately, our town isn't that "techie" yet, or some sort, and that's why using blogs as my progress tracker would be a bit hard. But I plan to at least have 1 report posted every month, depending on the time and availability constraints.
3) Last but not the least, NEVER LOSE FOCUS ON THE GOAL. The goal of this mission, as it name suggests is to re-ignite my passion towards things. May it be academics, or cooking, or music, it really does not matter. As long as I can find a rhythm or some sort to spice up life once more, then I would take every opportunity life has to offer.
So, this concludes my Christmas random posts. Happy Holidays to everyone. Hope God gives you something extra special (like my mission) this Christmas. This has been Jowee XD, signing out...for now....
And so this Christmas, I would like to start something which I can call a journey, to where I know not of, but I believe of it as quite a worthwhile experience for me. And I call it Mission: Re-ignition
So how do I do this mission? I really have no idea at all. I haven't planned it all out just yet, but there are some things that I will be sure to do as this plan goes along.
1) I shall look for things that makes my heart and brain work together. In short, something worthwhile that I would LOVE to do. ( like blogging :] )
2) I shall keep track of any progress whatsoever. Now this one is somewhat tricky, due to the fact that the first part of this mission takes place in the beautiful province of Oriental Mindoro. Unfortunately, our town isn't that "techie" yet, or some sort, and that's why using blogs as my progress tracker would be a bit hard. But I plan to at least have 1 report posted every month, depending on the time and availability constraints.
3) Last but not the least, NEVER LOSE FOCUS ON THE GOAL. The goal of this mission, as it name suggests is to re-ignite my passion towards things. May it be academics, or cooking, or music, it really does not matter. As long as I can find a rhythm or some sort to spice up life once more, then I would take every opportunity life has to offer.
So, this concludes my Christmas random posts. Happy Holidays to everyone. Hope God gives you something extra special (like my mission) this Christmas. This has been Jowee XD, signing out...for now....
Lunes, Disyembre 5, 2011
This Christmas...part 2
So I was hanging out with my buddies, and we were just talking about usual stuff. And then we went to a topic that we all love to talk about, especially with my friend Mike.
And that topic is about: LOVE LIFE!
This Christmas, it's going to be a "big deal" not having a "love life", especially here in the Philippines. There's this thing they call SMP, or Samahan ng Malalamig ang Pasko. And to be honest, I really don't get this.
Why should it be a "big deal" not to have someone special with you this Christmas season. I mean, c'mon! IT"S NOT VALENTINE'S DAY. And even if it is, I still believe that you can still be happy being single during these times.
I admit there's someone I really like at the moment. Mike and I exchange ideas about the persons we like respectively, and I believe we share the same sentiment on this.
Yes, it would really be cool if we could be together with our special someone this holiday season, but more important than this, we would really love if we could all cherish the true meaning of the season, CHRIST'S COMING FOR OUR SALVATION, and to remind each other that this love exists, something far more greater than anything we can ever feel for somebody.
And I do hope that we would all be reminded of this: the true meaning of the Yuletide season. I hope you would enjoy this gift during the holidays, and that we would cherish the things we are now able to do because He has come and saved us.
AND HAVING SOMEONE SPECIAL WITH YOU WOULD BE VERY NICE, TOO :)
And that topic is about: LOVE LIFE!
This Christmas, it's going to be a "big deal" not having a "love life", especially here in the Philippines. There's this thing they call SMP, or Samahan ng Malalamig ang Pasko. And to be honest, I really don't get this.
Why should it be a "big deal" not to have someone special with you this Christmas season. I mean, c'mon! IT"S NOT VALENTINE'S DAY. And even if it is, I still believe that you can still be happy being single during these times.
I admit there's someone I really like at the moment. Mike and I exchange ideas about the persons we like respectively, and I believe we share the same sentiment on this.
Yes, it would really be cool if we could be together with our special someone this holiday season, but more important than this, we would really love if we could all cherish the true meaning of the season, CHRIST'S COMING FOR OUR SALVATION, and to remind each other that this love exists, something far more greater than anything we can ever feel for somebody.
And I do hope that we would all be reminded of this: the true meaning of the Yuletide season. I hope you would enjoy this gift during the holidays, and that we would cherish the things we are now able to do because He has come and saved us.
AND HAVING SOMEONE SPECIAL WITH YOU WOULD BE VERY NICE, TOO :)
Sabado, Disyembre 3, 2011
This Christmas...part 1
So this will be a series of posts about random things I think of during this holiday season..
This Christmas, I would really love to be with
these guys..I really miss my dad and my sister..I've been living with them for the past 20 years of my life, and this was the first year that I lived on my own..I really miss how we bond in the most unusual ways for a family, but I enjoy them very much..And this holiday vacation, I look forward to be with them again and to be able to catch up with thing about each other..I hope that even with the circumstances that brought us away from each other will be overcome by the spirit of loving and forgiveness during this season..:)
This Christmas, I would really love to be with
Linggo, Nobyembre 27, 2011
Silence: a very long talk to a friend I truly missed
Hi there..ahmm..Been a while right?...ahhmm..So, what's been up?..Really?..Wow..ahmmm...
Ever had those times when you been away from someone, and then meeting them up again you say things like that phrase up top over there?
That's kind of how I feel as I type blogspot.com in the web browser after quite a few days, even weeks I think. Not that I don't want to write no more, it's just really hard for me to start talking about things after a long period of non-discourse. And so I think it's best to talk about the things we've missed out. The period I call silence.
Silence: from the latin word Silentium which means absence of sound, first used in the 13th Century.
So what does silence really mean? I have read and heard things about silence and its connotation to people, but for me silence is best described from the perspective of which it came from. Silence starts with something that does not emit sound or motion, and therefore it depends on what reason this thing has on choosing silence over activity, to fully understand the meaning of silence.
Now, because this depends on the source of silence, its meaning, therefore, varies from one source to another.
For people, moreover, there are a LOT of reasons why silence is chosen over activity. I have read and heard that for some women, the silent treatment is their way of expressing disappointment on something that somebody has done, also known as the cold shoulder. Some men do that as well, but it is primarily a woman thing. For some, silence is their way of seeking attention from other people, especially when they are not really the silent-type person. This expresses irregularity in the person which induces people to think something is wrong because that is not the normal behavior of the person.
So....
Why did we have this long silence between us blogger.com?
Wanna know why?
because I was....
yes, I was sad, and apparently I still am.
and the saddest part is, I really don't know how to fix it.
And silence was one of the few things I know how to do in order to think thoroughly over something that matters a lot and is valuable to me.
There are some things that I am not really satisfied with at the moment, but I know for a fact that there is nothing I can do right now that can help in fixing such things up.
It's not that it's hard for me, it's just that there are some things that I have to face which I don't think I am ready to face right now.
And maybe facing you is one of a few steps I can take for me to overcome this sadness. If only I can take you out for some games and dinner to make it up to you, I definitely will my friend. But since you're just a website, I'll just stick to what we are allowed and able to do together.
Thanks for being a good listener dude..I hope God gives other people a chance to meet a person, or a website just like you. :)
Your dear friend,
Jowee
Ever had those times when you been away from someone, and then meeting them up again you say things like that phrase up top over there?
That's kind of how I feel as I type blogspot.com in the web browser after quite a few days, even weeks I think. Not that I don't want to write no more, it's just really hard for me to start talking about things after a long period of non-discourse. And so I think it's best to talk about the things we've missed out. The period I call silence.
Silence: from the latin word Silentium which means absence of sound, first used in the 13th Century.
So what does silence really mean? I have read and heard things about silence and its connotation to people, but for me silence is best described from the perspective of which it came from. Silence starts with something that does not emit sound or motion, and therefore it depends on what reason this thing has on choosing silence over activity, to fully understand the meaning of silence.
Now, because this depends on the source of silence, its meaning, therefore, varies from one source to another.
For people, moreover, there are a LOT of reasons why silence is chosen over activity. I have read and heard that for some women, the silent treatment is their way of expressing disappointment on something that somebody has done, also known as the cold shoulder. Some men do that as well, but it is primarily a woman thing. For some, silence is their way of seeking attention from other people, especially when they are not really the silent-type person. This expresses irregularity in the person which induces people to think something is wrong because that is not the normal behavior of the person.
So....
Why did we have this long silence between us blogger.com?
Wanna know why?
because I was....
yes, I was sad, and apparently I still am.
and the saddest part is, I really don't know how to fix it.
And silence was one of the few things I know how to do in order to think thoroughly over something that matters a lot and is valuable to me.
There are some things that I am not really satisfied with at the moment, but I know for a fact that there is nothing I can do right now that can help in fixing such things up.
It's not that it's hard for me, it's just that there are some things that I have to face which I don't think I am ready to face right now.
And maybe facing you is one of a few steps I can take for me to overcome this sadness. If only I can take you out for some games and dinner to make it up to you, I definitely will my friend. But since you're just a website, I'll just stick to what we are allowed and able to do together.
Thanks for being a good listener dude..I hope God gives other people a chance to meet a person, or a website just like you. :)
Your dear friend,
Jowee
Biyernes, Nobyembre 18, 2011
WARNING: PINOY FACEBOOK!
The porn attacks originated in the Philippines and are being published by Filipinos all over Facebook, our experts here at Facebook are doing everything they can to stop it from spreading any further (outside the Philippines) and to eliminate the porn and spam threat completely which have been causing other Facebook users ‘a hard time’. Filipinos should also be vigilant and report any spam links and pornographic materials. 41% of Facebook members around the world are aged 12-17 years old, we cannot be exposed to this kinds of things through Facebook. If this continues and more spams keep being posted, we will have no choice but to ban Philippine users from using Facebook. We at Facebook will not tolerate outlandish behavior and indecency. - Mark Zuckerberg, FACEBOOK CEO
So I have seen reports and posts lately about hackers on Facebook who posts explicit materials and liking pornographic sites using unsecured Facebook accounts. And as the reports said, they originated here in the Philippines. Yes, that's right: in the Philippines!
The country where people serve guests with all they have whether they are close relatives or just new friends, even strangers for the fact. The country where bayanihan used to happen, people dropping everything they have just to help out their fellow countrymen. The country where family ties and values weigh much more value than social norms.
And now these? Where are these Filipino traits we used to have? Where are the things I used to be proud of being Filipino? Have we lost them all? I know for a fact that our country has tons of social and economic problems as of the moment ( I would know, it's related to what I am studying now), but do we blame these things and then act accordingly to its consequences?
I admit I too had my days of hormonal rage and stuff, but still I have the decency and reasoning to keep it to myself then. As the post said, 41% of Facebook members are adolescent people, going through such hormonal imbalance in their bodies as well as we do. Do you think we exposing them to these $#!z would help them any better?
It really discourages me when I see these things happening to our country. I have always been praying for our beloved country, that one day God will reign and bring His Kingdom here because everything is better when He is in rule. And though these things may dishearten me, I will continue to pray unceasingly for our fellow countrymen, that they would see God as I have seen Him working in my life and the lives of people around me. I pray for these souls who do not know the eternal punishment for the things they do, but more importantly they realize that there is eternal forgiveness in God's unconditional love and justice.
So I have seen reports and posts lately about hackers on Facebook who posts explicit materials and liking pornographic sites using unsecured Facebook accounts. And as the reports said, they originated here in the Philippines. Yes, that's right: in the Philippines!
The country where people serve guests with all they have whether they are close relatives or just new friends, even strangers for the fact. The country where bayanihan used to happen, people dropping everything they have just to help out their fellow countrymen. The country where family ties and values weigh much more value than social norms.
And now these? Where are these Filipino traits we used to have? Where are the things I used to be proud of being Filipino? Have we lost them all? I know for a fact that our country has tons of social and economic problems as of the moment ( I would know, it's related to what I am studying now), but do we blame these things and then act accordingly to its consequences?
I admit I too had my days of hormonal rage and stuff, but still I have the decency and reasoning to keep it to myself then. As the post said, 41% of Facebook members are adolescent people, going through such hormonal imbalance in their bodies as well as we do. Do you think we exposing them to these $#!z would help them any better?
It really discourages me when I see these things happening to our country. I have always been praying for our beloved country, that one day God will reign and bring His Kingdom here because everything is better when He is in rule. And though these things may dishearten me, I will continue to pray unceasingly for our fellow countrymen, that they would see God as I have seen Him working in my life and the lives of people around me. I pray for these souls who do not know the eternal punishment for the things they do, but more importantly they realize that there is eternal forgiveness in God's unconditional love and justice.
That Awkward Moment When...IMPOSSIBRUUU :|
So, I see a lot of posts in social networking sites about "awkward moments". And as I read them all out, some of them I find really awkward, and some of them not so much. Some of them I experience all the time, and some weren't even existing in my "Wild Imagination" brain section.
I really like having fun, and I loved the way this youtube person uses his wittiness and charms to have fun and express himself at the same time. I loved his rendition of reacting to awkward moment posts and this inspired me to do the same. If you wanna see the video, here's the link :P
http://www.youtube.com/user/nigahiga#p/u/3/5__rFK07pGI
I talked to a close friend earlier and one of our topics was doing things that we love, and because I go for the saying "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him", I am going to satisfy myself by doing two things I love at the same time: trolling around and setting new trends.This is currently a trend on one of my favorite internet sites, and I think i would like to give it a twist :P
Disclaimer: this post is for fun purposes only and is not intending to upset certain trends of socially uncomfortable situations whatsoever.This may or may not also have sense, but what the heck :P
Lady's and gentlemen!
JouiseXD Inc. proudly launches the newest social trend..
where anyone can relate and agree upon..
where imagination and reality meets!
INTRODUCING...
IMPOSSIBRUUUU! (because awkward moments are so....early 2011-ish)
basically, you just have to think of something hard or almost impossible to do and you post it on any social networking site you're into, and then....I really don't know what's gonna happen next, maybe people will comment something harder to do, or something more impossible..I don't know..but hey, it's something new right? So, if like me you want to try new stuff all the time and set a new trend on your favorite sites, then this one might be worth a try..so, you up to the challenge?
I really like having fun, and I loved the way this youtube person uses his wittiness and charms to have fun and express himself at the same time. I loved his rendition of reacting to awkward moment posts and this inspired me to do the same. If you wanna see the video, here's the link :P
http://www.youtube.com/user/nigahiga#p/u/3/5__rFK07pGI
I talked to a close friend earlier and one of our topics was doing things that we love, and because I go for the saying "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him", I am going to satisfy myself by doing two things I love at the same time: trolling around and setting new trends.This is currently a trend on one of my favorite internet sites, and I think i would like to give it a twist :P
Disclaimer: this post is for fun purposes only and is not intending to upset certain trends of socially uncomfortable situations whatsoever.This may or may not also have sense, but what the heck :P
Lady's and gentlemen!
JouiseXD Inc. proudly launches the newest social trend..
where anyone can relate and agree upon..
where imagination and reality meets!
INTRODUCING...
IMPOSSIBRUUUU! (because awkward moments are so....early 2011-ish)
basically, you just have to think of something hard or almost impossible to do and you post it on any social networking site you're into, and then....I really don't know what's gonna happen next, maybe people will comment something harder to do, or something more impossible..I don't know..but hey, it's something new right? So, if like me you want to try new stuff all the time and set a new trend on your favorite sites, then this one might be worth a try..so, you up to the challenge?
Y U NO GIVE IT A TRY?
Here's some examples for you to use :P
- Tried eating porridge with a fork. IMPOSSIBRUUU!
- Tried scooping soup with my fingers. IMPOSSIBRUUU!
- Tried sending SMS without load balance. IMPOSSIBRUUU!
- Tried kissing my elbow. IMPOSSIBRUUU!
- Tried to make a new trend. Hope this one's not
I know this doesn't make any sense. But this is really what blogging is about right? expressing yourself and doing what your heart desires, however silly or senseless it may look like :)
"For with God, nothing shall be impossible." - Luke 1:37 King James Version :)
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