Quote of the Day

This is something that I realized today. I don't know if there's an already existing saying like this. Here it goes:

Hindi ka pwedeng sumuko

Kung hindi ka pa naman lumalaban.

Hindi ka pwedeng umayaw

Kung hindi mo pa nasusubukan

White Lady!

Are you expecting this to post to be kinda scary?

LIKE THIS?!

Sorry about that. :P

And sorry but that's the only scary thing about this post..because this is about my type of girl, very unrelated to

THIS!

HAHA

Okay enough with scaring you.

This is really about how I find women very, very attractive when they wear any white outfit. Give me a girl all dressed up with nursing outfit, and my eyes would do 

THIS

if they only can.

I am very much attracted to women in white. I remember back then, my ideal girl was a nurse who has braces  and knows how to ride a motorcycle. That was my Venus back then.

But mainly these ideals were because I admire women who appear clean or having a very "clean aura" in them.

I often see girls especially when I go out, and I find cute girls very often. But it is very rare for me to be stunned when I see a girl, and this usually happens when I see a very pretty girl wearing white. It's like any dark day can turn into a sun shiny day.

I remember seeing my present crush wear white, quite a long time ago. She was walking from afar, and being the farsighted me, I was able to notice her very stunning presence right away. If I can only tell her to stay at that place so I can look and admire her at my optimal vision, I would really love to shout that out right that very moment. I mean, DAMN! did she look like an angel or what? For me, that was the prettiest moment of her in my memory.

Anyway, I would also like to give an update about the story I promised my utol, a few posts back if you recall. I finally decided the flow of the story in detail and I am currently writing it now. Actually, this post is the only reason I stopped it, so I hope you guys got scared with my post.

YOU MEAN LIKE THIS?!

TEEHEE! :P

FRIENDZONED?

It's becoming a trend!

So last time, I posted about my ex-girlfriend sharing her secret blog to me, right?

Guess what, another past love interest I had (the latest of them) also shared a secret blog of her, also about her love life!

At first I was " okay, this is awkward *insert le badly drawn poker face here like this :|*

and then it hit me!

It's becoming a trend!

I AM BEING PUT INTO A DREADED PLACE!

THE FRIENDZONE! (JEN JEN DEN JEN!)

Of course I am just exaggerating.

It' kind of a joke actually. I mean I actually take it as a good thing because it just means that people, especially girl are trusting me with things of their hearts. It's kind of a privilege to be able to be trusted with such things, but still it's better if women share these kind of things to other women to promote their accountability to them. And knowing these two girls, I know they are not that open with their heart to other girls. I am thinking of helping them think more about sharing to their women friends more than to me, coz it's REALLY AWKWARD TO FEEL FRIENDZONED! LOLZ

It's really a scary place. I just hope the one I like right now won't make me go to that dreaded place, for as the sign says :ABANDON ALL HOPE ALL YE WHO ENTER!

A Win-____ Situation?

And I'm back to writing.

Something happened last night which made me inspired to go back to writing again. Another fiction story perhaps.

I was playing Pokemon Fire Red Version, like I always do for the past week. I don't have much to do, I don't go to school anymore so I don't have ANYTHING else important to do. I have two laptops on, one for playing and the other to browse the walkthrough of the game, I somehow forgot some things regarding the gameplay. I was also on Facebook that time.

*BUZZ*

The buzzing sound of receiving a message on Facebook startled me, I was in the middle of catching a legendary Pokemon, Zapdos. Who can this be? This better be important.

It was one of my ex-girlfriends.

"tol"

"oi tol, musta? nu meron?", I replied.

The next message I received was a link; I opened it right away.

It lead me to a blog she had written on Tumblr. It was relatively new.

"Secret blog ko tol."

I was like "Oh God Why?" Why would she give me access to her secret blog site? I was hesistant, but she told me to read it so I did just that.

"para naman may alam ka tungkol sakin"

We haven't seen each other in a while. The only communication we had was Facebook. But if there's something big I knew about her, it's something that we had in common last year.

We were both left out by our "special someone" at the same time frame last year. We both took it hard deep inside, but knowing her, she didn't let any sign of these hurts show in any way, much like I did.

I was reading her blog, it had a nice layout with music on background. It only had 3 songs, all of which are Utada Hikaru's First Love, only with different versions (1 original, 1 english version, 1 instrumental).

As I was reading I eventually got the sense of why she let me read this and why the background music was almost the same.

Biglaang Kalungkutan was the blog title. And First Love was their theme song, her boyfriend and her.

To make her story short, her boyfriend left her after being together for 3 years. 3 YEARS! I mean the longest serious relationship I had with a girlfriend was 8 months! 3 YEARS! Is this a trend nowadays? I know another couple who'd been in love with each other for the longest time and now they're also apart. What is the world coming into?!

As for every story, there's a good thing and a bad thing it brings about to the reader.

For me, the good thing was the reason I can write this blog post right now. The story was so touching. Until now she still holds on to her feeling s for that guy despite him doing the best he can to throw my Utol under the rug. She fights hard everyday, seeing him with another girl, seeing her own friends ignore her hurts. I admire her toughness, though I have known this trait of hers a long time now. I never knew that someone as tough as my Utol can be this devoted and loving, to the extent of being hurt so badly.

Reading her story inspired me to write a story of my own, based on hers. I would love to turn something this inspiring to me into something that hopefully may be able to touch others as well. Yes, it will be a love story  but it will be one with real heart poured into it, mine and that of my Utol's.

Now the bad part.

I may be encouraged regarding the writing aspect, which is good by the way, but I am very much discouraged on the loving aspect :(

I still can't get over the fact that even long term relationships can still end in a snap. I just had my heart broken last year, a full year of offering my heart to that person. I made it through, I have moved on. But 3 years is still too GRAND for me. I know that if I can get the chance to be with someone for three years, I would really give all that I've got for it to never end. But it seems that all that my Utol got was not enough.

What if what I've got will not be enough as well? I have a special girl right now, of course she doesn't know I like her. Some of my friends are telling me it's about time to take another shot at love and take a chance with her. But right now, after last night's alone time with my two laptops, nearly shedding a few tears, I don't know whether to listen to them or listen to my discouraged heart.

It may save me from hurts if I hold back my heart for my own, that will be a win for me. But I may never have that experience only people who have given their love wholeheartedly to someone special may be able to know. And that will be a BIG loss for me.

Writing: WIN
Love: I am not so sure. And I may never be able to be sure at all, if worse come to worse :(

This Christmas: Final Part

So, it's official..I am going to quit school for an indefinite span of time. I realized that one thing I need right now is passion and commitment to something, and I honestly don't see it in the academic realm.

And so this Christmas, I would like to start something which I can call a journey, to where I know not of, but I believe of it as quite a worthwhile experience for me. And I call it Mission: Re-ignition

So how do I do this mission? I really have no idea at all. I haven't planned it all out just yet, but there are some things that I will be sure to do as this plan goes along.

1) I shall look for things that makes my heart and brain work together. In short, something worthwhile that I would LOVE to do. ( like blogging :] )

2) I shall keep track of any progress whatsoever. Now this one is somewhat tricky, due to the fact that the first part of this mission takes place in the beautiful province of Oriental Mindoro. Unfortunately, our town isn't that "techie" yet, or some sort, and that's why using blogs as my progress tracker would be a bit hard. But I plan to at least have 1 report posted every month, depending on the time and availability constraints.

3) Last but not the least, NEVER LOSE FOCUS ON THE GOAL. The goal of this mission, as it name suggests is to re-ignite my passion towards things. May it be academics, or cooking, or music, it really does not matter. As long as I can find a rhythm or some sort to spice up life once more, then I would take every opportunity life has to offer.

So, this concludes my Christmas random posts. Happy Holidays to everyone. Hope God gives you something extra special (like my mission) this Christmas. This has been Jowee XD, signing out...for now....

This Christmas...part 2

So I was hanging out with my buddies, and we were just talking about usual stuff. And then we went to a topic that we all love to talk about, especially with my friend Mike.

And that topic is about: LOVE LIFE!

This Christmas, it's going to be a "big deal" not having a "love life", especially here in the Philippines. There's this thing they call SMP, or Samahan ng Malalamig ang Pasko. And to be honest, I really don't get this.

Why should it be a "big deal" not to have someone special with you this Christmas season. I mean, c'mon! IT"S NOT VALENTINE'S DAY. And even if it is, I still believe that you can still be happy being single during these times.

I admit there's someone I really like at the moment. Mike and I exchange ideas about the persons we like respectively, and I believe  we share the same sentiment on this.

Yes, it would really be cool if we could be together with our special someone this holiday season, but more important than this, we would really love if we could all cherish the true meaning of the season, CHRIST'S COMING FOR OUR SALVATION, and to remind each other that this love exists, something far more greater than anything we can ever feel for somebody.

And I do hope that we would all be reminded of this: the true meaning of the Yuletide season. I hope you would enjoy this gift during the holidays, and that we would cherish the things we are now able to do because He has come and saved us.

AND HAVING SOMEONE SPECIAL WITH YOU WOULD BE VERY NICE, TOO :)

This Christmas...part 1

So this will be a series of posts about random things I think of during this holiday season..

This Christmas, I would really love to be with

these guys..I really miss my dad and my sister..I've been living with them for the past 20 years of my life, and this was the first year that I lived on my own..I really miss how we bond in the most unusual ways for a family, but I enjoy them very much..And this holiday vacation, I look forward to be with them again and to be able to catch up with thing about each other..I hope that even with the circumstances that brought us away from each other will be overcome by the spirit of loving and forgiveness during this season..:)